We’ve Got Mail

Winter’s in full stride, so we know you have plenty of time on your idle hands to write. Valentine’s Day is coming up-send us a love letter. Electronic sweet nothings can be sent to: twshasmail@yahoo.com.

Or, seal it with a kiss to:

TransWorld SKATEboarding

Attn.: We’ve Got Mail

353 Airport Road

Oceanside, California 92054

This month, best letter gets a deck from _____.

LETTER OF THE MONTH My son is fourteen, loves to skate, and is a huge fan of Jamie Thomas. When he heard the Pope was suing Jamie, he poured out his heart in this letter. Thank you for reading this.-Mary Bates

Dear Pope, Hello, Your Holiness. I’m writing to you concerning you suing Jamie Thomas because of his use of the cross. First off, he’s doing this to show his respect and love for our beloved Jesus Christ. He’s a great person and is just trying to spread his religious beliefs.

Second, why sue? Has greed overtaken your soul? If you want to sue anyway, why not sue someone who believes in and/or worships Satan? Money is just a symbolic substance that means nothing. So why take money that he has earned when he is going to take this income to put crosses on shirts and other items to spread the word of God. If you sue him, you might as well sue anyone who wears a cross or reads the Bible. He’s the first person to make believing in Jesus cool. And in doing this, it’s making the world a better place. Skateboarding is becoming a huge thing that many teens take part in, and I’m sure they need to believe in something at such a crucial age. And Jamie Thomas is trying to make that something Jesus. I found Jamie’s skating, and he started me believing again.

Third, you’re an influential person to all-suing Jamie would be a bad example. I never thought the Pope would sue someone, but since you are, you have put in perspective what people will do for money these days. And if it’s to the point where the Pope will sue a religious person like Jamie Thomas to make a quick buck, I don’t know what it’s going to be like when I’m grown. If you sue him, it will be on your conscience, not his, and God will see it, and karma will be good for Jamie.-Jesse Bates, Glade Valley, North Carolina

Ow, I guess you didn’t get the memo, Jesse: April Fool’s! Well here’s a free deck courtesy of _____.

TEMPLETON FIRES BACK Dear Larissa Carlson, I was about to give a half-apology for calling the new pope a Nazi, thinking that maybe I was being too crass in doing so, when I started reading up on him. I found out that during his tenure at the Vatican as Pope John Paul II’s right-hand man, he personally headed the effort to raise the Nazi-collaborating Pious XII into sainthood and threatened to bar other Catholics, like presidential candidate John Kerry, from the sacraments for having different views than his own on abortion and birth control.

Furthermore, he publicly praised the fascist movement in the church known as Opus Dei and supported the canonization of Jose Maria Escriva, the founder of Opus Dei, an open fascist who served in the government of Spain’s dictator Franco, who also publicly praised Hitler (quote from Rabbi Michael Lerner). These do not seem like the actions of someone who leads by example, using his good deeds to prove that his faith is guiding him in the right direction. Instead, he forbids birth control to AIDS-ridden countries

in Africa, making the situation clearly worse. This seems more like an evil deed than a good one in my book. That is why I called him an “agent of evil.” There is no “prevailing anti-Catholic attitude” in this world. The entire country shuts down for Christmas and Easter, and millions of students across the U.S.A. recite the pledge of allegiance including the line, “one nation, under God” every day. I am not anti religion in any form, unless that religion contributes in a negative way to some of the world’s biggest problems. Obviously our views differ in this area.

Respectfully, Ed Templeton

Humbleie for dinner all week, Larissa.

AT LEAST HE’LL NEVER PUSH MONGO A man passes by a kid sitting with his skateboard. He hesitates, but then asks, “Why do you skateboard?” The kid glances in the man’s general direction, shrugs, then looks on. The man attempts to continue the conversation by asking various questions about other interests, school, etc. The kid finds it difficult to overlook the fact that the man is missing both of his legs. Curious, the kid asks,

“What happened to your legs?”

“Lost ‘em in the war.”

The kid nods in acknowledgement. He starts to think about it. “You miss ‘em?”

“They were everything to me. Without my legs I’ll never be the same from now on. I’m just not complete as a human being.” The kid, although slightly sympathetic, nods again. “So, you never answered my question.”

“Which one was that?” asks the kid.

“Why do you skate?”

The kid pauses for a moment, “Well, I guess skateboarding means to me what your legs mean to you.”

So here’s my attempt to express what skateboarding means to me, though I don’t know if it’s possible to write in words the sense of euphoria and total satisfaction I get every time I step on my board. Here’s to you, TransWorld, for your continuous help in convincing the skating populous that skateboarding is like a missing limb; without it we would never be complete.-Alex Kirby, Cheyenne, Wyoming

Touching story, Alex, but did you steal this off the Internet somewhere?

YOU NEED A BLACKLIGHT As a skater/parent, I felt compelled to write to praise your mag on its effort to continue skating’s progression in the 21st century. My advice to any parent who thinks skating is a crime is to think again. Skating has given me confidence and my sons many highs that drugs can’t ever match. And as for Mr. Trolf’s opinion on Dan Gesmer being the cancer of skateboarding-he’s plain wrong. I viewed the download and was amazed at Mr. Gesmer’s talent for a kind of skating rarely seen today. My opinion is that Mr. Trolf is the genital wart of journalism. Well, keep skating, and Mr. Trolf, either skate or shut up.-Ed Ashley, Willseyville, New York

Fight fire with fire, just watch out for flare-ups.

SHOCKER My name is Shaka, I’m twelve years old, and I was reading the December issue when Daewon did the 360 flip manual trick tip, and he said, “Shaka, brah!” Now this might not seem like much, but to have Daewon say my name was so awesome. I wasn’t even named after the Hawai’ian saying. I was so stoked to go do a 360 flip, too bad I can only ollie and heelflip. You guys rule!-Shaka Dendy, Orlando, Florida

Just hang loose, then, and those three flips will come.

OFFICE SPACE I’m fourteen and live in a little shit town with about 150 people in it. We have really stupid career classes in school where we’re supposed to pick a career. I didn’t circle any of the choices, instead I filled in “skateboarder.” So when I got it back the next day, my teacher filled it out for me with lawyer as my career choice. Lawyer? Why would I want to be a lawyer? Being crammed in an office all day, doing paperwork, going into court listening to people bitch and whine all the time. What kind of job is that? Your mag is part of the reason that I’m still sane. Screw preps, and skaters should rule the world!-Greysen Ulmer, Marion, North Dakota

Yeah, you should set your sites on a cool job like working here at TWS, where you’ll be, um, in an office all day, and, uh, doing paperwork where skaters bitch and whine. Um, we forgot the point … oh yeah, screw the preps!

TELL ‘EM BART SENT YA Black Bart here from the Sunset Riders of North Dakota. My son subscribes to your magazine, and I saw in your January issue the Outside The Law article with those skaters ridin’ their hogs across our great land-I ride a 2002 Fatboy myself. I was proud to see these young boys flying the red, white, and blue, too. Well, if these boys are going to be around next year, I want to personally invite them on up to Sturgis for the Black Hills Rally. I’ll show ‘em a real good time. Damn fine photography by Mr. O’Meally.-Black Bart, Devils Lake, North Dakota

We’ll check with the Emerica team and get back to you, but O’Meally’s in for sure. Look out for a big, crazy-eyed Aussie going by the name of Chopper.

FAN OUT RAN OUT I just wanted to say I really like the new look of your mag. Especially the Home Page with Ryan Smith and the Top Ten Hustlers. Do you know where I can get one of those tall tees with Darren Harper’s face on them? Where does Ryan Smith get pre-gripped boards? That makes so much more sense to me. Are his tattoos real? They look a lot like Anthony Van Engelen’s tattoos. What’s that all-white soda can he’s holding? Is that some special Mystery drink? Well, keep up the good work, you’ve got a fan in Missoula who’s waiting patiently for the next issue!-Patrick Top, Missoula, Montana

Those Darren Harper ghetto gowns are sure to be the toast of the spring retail season in your local shops. As for Ryan Smith’s special Mystery drink-he gets them in packs of eighteen.

them on up to Sturgis for the Black Hills Rally. I’ll show ‘em a real good time. Damn fine photography by Mr. O’Meally.-Black Bart, Devils Lake, North Dakota

We’ll check with the Emerica team and get back to you, but O’Meally’s in for sure. Look out for a big, crazy-eyed Aussie going by the name of Chopper.

FAN OUT RAN OUT I just wanted to say I really like the new look of your mag. Especially the Home Page with Ryan Smith and the Top Ten Hustlers. Do you know where I can get one of those tall tees with Darren Harper’s face on them? Where does Ryan Smith get pre-gripped boards? That makes so much more sense to me. Are his tattoos real? They look a lot like Anthony Van Engelen’s tattoos. What’s that all-white soda can he’s holding? Is that some special Mystery drink? Well, keep up the good work, you’ve got a fan in Missoula who’s waiting patiently for the next issue!-Patrick Top, Missoula, Montana

Those Darren Harper ghetto gowns are sure to be the toast of the spring retail season in your local shops. As for Ryan Smith’s special Mystery drink-he gets them in packs of eighteen.

CATEGORIZED: Magazine