Chris Troy

By Ohio Dave

“Shadows are falling and I’ve been here all day It’s too hot to sleep time is running away Feel like my soul has turned into steel I’ve still got the scars that the sun didn’t heal There’s not even room enough to be anywhere It’s not dark yet, but it’s getting there…”-Robert Allen Zimmerman

So who are you?
What is it that you actually do?
Take us through a walk in the park. Well, just between you and me, I tend to look forward to what is going to happen and forget about what is happening. Even the night before, I am already thinking of how good my burritos are going to be from Lola’s. Also including where we should skate and who it should be with. I always end up calling Expedition superstar Kenneth Hoyle, Cooney, or whoever wants to go out and get aggro. We always just end up at either Adio or the Leucadia park. Back to the question of who I am, that depends on whom you ask. Enemies say I am an a-hole, girls say I am dreamy, cops say I am a vagrant, and my parents say I am growing up too fast-none of which are true.

Who is foolish enough to support you in skateboarding?
Black Label Shoe Company, Adio Skateboards, Innes Hats, Brixton Clothing, Spitfire Trucks, and Independent Wheels.

What’s the deal behind you and Hensley working out some deal with Innes to mass produce wife beaters?
Well, it was more of a mutual experimental idea that we had come up with on this past summer’s tour. I wore them everyday and at every demo. Matt caught on after a while. Because if I was a smart am, I would’ve been rocking Innes stuff to support. So we both agreed that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to start making some. Why wouldn’t you want custom wife beaters?
Hensley is the sh-t.

Speaking of Minnesota Fats, have you ever beat him in a game of pool?
(Laughs) Not yet dammit. I can’t sleep at night ’cause of it. I’ll get down to the eight ball and blow it, and then he clears the table in the blink of an eye. But once he opens his new bar-Hensley’s Flying Elephant-in our hometown of Carlsbad, California, there might be a new sheriff in town.

How long have you been aboard the Label program?
Chris has been riding for Label for about a thrilling four years now.

Damn, I didn’t know we had a third person in this interview. Since then, have there been any memorable stories about John Lucero?

Oh man, he definitely loves his share of boozing with us on a daily basis during the trips we go on. But other than that, he’s just a good-ass boss to have. He’s always making sure we’re psyched.

Rumor has it you’re in the process of buying your first automobile?
Rumors are factual in this case. It’s a 1965 Oldsmobile Cutlass. That’s right, a Cutty. Sh-t’s got a 330 V8, dual Flowmaster exhaust, new root-beer-brown paint, and some fresh interior. It basically blows doors! The good part is that it comes with an extra engine and wheels. I’m thankful to have such a car genius as my dad.

So your dad’s into cars and motorcycles-how did you get into skateboarding?
Aww, good point. Same answer though-my dad. He was basically the class of ’69 and did some badass sh-t. He’s down for everything and used to skate just like everyone else’s dad. I got my first board at four.

I can’t help but notice you’re on crutches?
Is there a reason behind this, or is it just for attention?
No, unfortunately not this time. This was outside of fantasyland. I was jumping down some sh-t like every other handful of ams in this crazed industry and basically fractured my heel in two places. Might as well do it the best you can.

It does seem to be going in that direction and always will. What’s your take on the whole “push to go big or go home”?

I mean, don’t get me wrong, sometimes doing that whole thing can be fun and necessary because that’s what allows the newer generations to come about-the constant push to be better. But on the contrary, in my eyes there’s a big difference of dooing tricks and knowing how to ride a skateboard. Sometimes bigger isn’t better.

Speaking of which, why haven’t you three flipped El Toro?
To be honest, my brain’s not against it, but my body is.

Truth or dare?
Truth.

Is it true that you did a big spin front board 270 twelve times in one night at L.A. High?
Partially true. I mean, we didn’t go there specifically for that reason. We were just skating the banks one night. My friend Jordan and I went in there for fun, and we ended up skating the rail for good times sake. This was after I had already done the original one in the Label ad. So I wanted to maybe try a couple more. I really only did it like five times in the same night. Sometimes I’m just not happy with doing things once and you gotta not stop until you’re satisfied with things-or your board breaks, as mine did in this case. I am out of my mind when it comes to skateboarding. Aren’t we all?

So I’ve noticed that boards are made of wood. You ever wonder why you knock on wood for good luck?
Oh yeah, like before trying a trick?
Well, it’s mainly because the good luck associated with wood probably comes from pagan times when trees were worshipped and believed to contain the spirits of gods. For instance, since lightning so often strikes trees, the oak was believed by some ancient cultures to be the dwelling place of the god of lightning and thunder. To touch or “rap” on a tree back then was a means of summoning the spirits within to come forth and provide the person doing the “rapping” with protection from evil or getting broke off.

Damn! I wasn’t expecting such a thorough rebuttal. What other knowledge do you possess that fascinates you?

Did you just say butt?
That’s not on the topic. The other day I was skating down the street after a fresh spring shower of rain, and I kept asking myself, “Why are there so many worms on the sidewalk.” I don’t think I’ll ever know.

Well, it just so happens I can help you out with this one. It’s because their holes get full of water. They are simply moving to higher ground.

That’s what I was thinking.

Now that you’ve put in your time, do your sponsors have you on the endless schedule of travel?
Since the Label video Back In Black, I have gotten to travel a lot more. Not that I wasn’t before, but not to the extent now. Things are happening all the time. Especially right now-I’m supposed to be in Spain filming for the upcoming Adio video this summer. Along with the possibility of another Label project by end of next summer. Apparently the pagan spirits of wood have other plans for me.

Speaking of wood, would you rather have a permanent smile or a permanent erection?

Definitely an erection, cause a smile doesn’t always please the ladies.

Enough flapping of the gums. Let’s get to some word association.

Naughty: Rope.
Marinate: Me on my couch.
Lucero: Tequila.
Tom Cruise: Speed 2, Cruise Control.
Woolly: Mammoth.
Mistress: Adultery.
California: Blown out.
Scrumptious: Rack o’ ribs.
Past: Childhood.
Present: Christmas.
Future: Death.

Finish it already. How shall one start to begin?
Weird how things work, you thank people, but never get thanked. The very interview you are reading was not possible without David Smith and the people at TransWorld. The remainders are strictly business and not friends or family. John Lucero, Travis Howell, Darin Howard, Mickey, Dan the Man, Lance Dawes, Keith Wilson, Matt Hensley, David Stoddard, Randy and Deborah Troy, friends, and of course, the one and only Matt Daughters. Spot on, Bevron.